I’m Marrying a Genius

He would disagree and tell you he is just another dumb kid, but don’t be fooled, Benjamin is by far one of the smartest people I have ever met.  The things he can figure out are amazing like how he created our ENTIRE wedding website from scratch.

But in all seriousness how does a (future) spouse legitimize her career when her (future) husband is going to save lives for a living?  This doesn’t just relate to me but to anyone out there that is in a similar position.  Many of the husband/wife combos I see in the medical field are defined by the husband as the physician and the wife as a stay-at-home mom.  There are of course exceptions and I am not oblivious to this fact. 

I fear that I will fall into the stay-at-home mom position although it is the farthest thing possible from what I want.  I dream of being the high powered business woman with a killer career and a position that I can really make an impact, not to mention amazing shoes to go with my power suits (Cashmere Mafia if you will.)  I want to be the girl version of my dad…he is needed all over the country to fix problems, schmoze other big wigs, and to talk with his employees.  While this would be absolutely wonderful and rewarding, I always wonder how one succeeds at doing it while at the same time providing a great family life.

I think about getting an MBA pretty much every day but I always stop short of thinking too hard about it because in all reality, how can I have a crazy career when my future husband will most likely be a surgeon?  I am a very realistic person and I tend to shy on the side of conservatism so how can I possibly justify spending a bazillion dollars on more schooling when I might not even use it?   Not to mention we already have plenty of loan debt looming over our heads.

I am not complaining by any means, I am simply pondering my future.  Benjamin is by far the most supportive person when it comes to my future career endeavors.  He actually went online and requested information from about 10 MBA programs without me really knowing.  Remember, this is the person who has chosen to go to school for life, a permastudent if you will.  My family on the other hand is of the opinion that given Benjamin’s chosen profession, I should consider staying at home to provide a great life for our future family.

My family’s opinion most likely stems from the fact that I was always in some sort of child care system until I was old enough to stay by myself.  Not to say day care was bad, but it wasn’t always the most fun.  I can remember times when I would just sob until my mom would come pick me up.  I can also remember wondering why my parents were always at work while my friends parents were home to take us shopping and to the movies and so forth. 

Both of my parents worked full time my whole life, until college, that’s when my mom quit her job.  It was great, I could call her anytime of day and she would be there to chat with me.  I think my mom realizes that she may have missed out on parts of my life and she doesn’t want that to happen to Ben and me.  On the flip side, I also respect her for working so long because our family wasn’t really in a position where she needed to.  She did it for herself and her own personal goals.  

I also saw what happened to my mom post-divorce.  She was out of the work force for about 6 years and was completely lost when it came time to get a job.  She has since started her own mini-business but it was a tough road and I would never want to be in that position.

I think this is the time in many people’s lives where they wonder where they are going…a quarter life crisis if you will.  We all want a great career, great family, great marriage, and most of all to be happy.  What steps should we take today to get what we want?  One thing I do know, I will fight with every ounce of me to make sure I have a great family and marriage.  Being the child of multiple divorced parents really makes you realize what is important to to fight for and what’s not.   

Charlie has a limp tail.

It’s a sad sight.  We think he hurt it but we can’t figure out how or when and we are assured from multiple websites that it should go away in a couple days.

But, our bouncy, happy, at times psychotically energetic lab isn’t so happy with his limp tail.  It’s like he is trying to wag it but it just doesn’t make it.  I think it is a little sensitive and swollen but Drs. Ben and Abbie have felt it and there are no kinks.

Currently he is snoring while passed out in a pile of pillows on our guest bed so I guess it isn’t too painful for him.

Torture

Oh. My. God!

 There is a car alarm going off outside our apartment and has been doing so on and off for the last 2 hours.

I think I might go crazy!!

I thought I had the culprit in sight and they were illegally parked.  Perfect!  I dialed up 311 (Chicago’s non-emergency line) in hopes of getting the car towed.  When the receptionist finally answered the alarm went off and I realized the illegally parked car had their flashers on…leaving me to believe that maybe, just maybe, that car wasn’t the culprit.  so, I gracefully hung up.

So for the last 2 hours I have sat here listening to the lovely sound of a car alarm.

I think I might scream.

Medicine for cabin fever

On my latest business trip I was near Virginia Beach so I couldn’t resist the temptation to see the ocean.  It was 60 degrees-not exactly beach weather but I was happy.  Here are a couple pictures I took:

It was refreshing to be in such warm weather.  It was just what I needed before I headed back to the 20 degree weather Chicago is currently experiencing.

Oh how I miss warm weather.

I typically enjoy the winter months.  I am not one of those people that complain everyday about how cold it is and how I want to move to a warmer climate.  I usually love my winter wardrobe and prefer it over the revealing outfits of summer (I will always and forever ban shorts from my closet).  But…I am done.  It is so freaking cold that I am about to go crazy.  I think I am suffering from a large case of cabin fever.  Also, our apartment is like a dungeon.  It is dark and cold and I don’t like it.  I am looking forward to our new place…two HUGE walls of floor to ceiling windows.  Or at least I think…I have only seen a floor plan.

Here are some of the things I am looking forward to: 

The feeling back in my hands and feet.
Not taking 10 minutes to dress myself to walk Charlie.
Not looking like a fool when I walk Charlie…the latest outfit was brown plaid wellington boots, black Gortex pants (over sweatpants), yellow ski coat, pink cashmere scarf, multicolored hat with a huge knit ball on top…awesome.
Running outside.
Walking to the lake.
Having a beer at a sidewalk cafe.
The bottom of my $160 jeans not getting ruined by the salt and sludge.
Not as many flight delays.
Leaves on trees.
Green grass.
Street festivals.
Free entertainment.

Ahh…I can’t wait.  I can feel the sunshine already.

Oh wait, there is a -9 wind chill with 20 mph winds. 

I love Chicago, I love Chicago, I love Chicago…

I think I might give myself an ulcer.

Whose idea was it to buy a condo in downtown Chicago?  Oh that’s right, mine.  I am kicking myself now.  Not only is buying a place stressful in the first place but the city makes it damn expensive!  We have to pay exorbitant taxes on the most ridiculous things.  And to make it even better, they just jacked up the tax on some money transfer thing (stamp-deed?)  Just in time for us to buy our place.  It adds about 1K to our closing costs.  Awesome.

I have added up our income, savings, and investments and then subtracted that from our down payment more time than I wish to remember (for some reason I think the numbers will change.)  I keep telling myself (with help from Ben) that everything will be fine and that we will not starve.  He reminded me that in college and the beginning of med school he lived at weeks at a time on a box of Raisin Bran.  He also reminded me he often had $4 in his checking account so he a pro at living like a poor person.  This comes from the man that added to our list of “future expenses” an Iphone, flat screen TV, a fancy digital camera, and a Smart car.

This should be fun.

Go here to check out the new digs.

BFFs

This is what our animals are doing right now:

Yes, that is 2 cats and 1 dog all laying practically on top of each other.

All in a days work.

Today’s schedule:

7:30 Meet boss for breakfast

8:00-11:00 Hard core work

11:30 Lunch

12:30-2:30 Shopping with boss: I helped him pick out 2 shirts, sunglasses, and a pair of shoes

2:45 Movie: we went to see 27 Dresses.  I am pretty happy my boss is comfortable with himself because I am pretty sure I would have never gotten anyone else to see it with me

5:00 Airport

I have the best job ever

I still hate New Jersey

I know I am never supposed use the word hate (my uncle taught me this when I was about 10…”Abbie, you don’t hate anything, you strongly dislike it”) but when it comes to New Jersey, I don’ think I could hate it more.

I called Ben last night and informed him that under no circumstances will I ever live here.  He might as well completely ignore the entire state when it comes to residencies because I WILL NOT move here.  He agreed.

I’ve spent the last three days here with my boss and it has been pretty terrible.  Everything with work went well, but this state is just gross.

They NEVER allow left turns and have center medians that run for about 3 miles…I am not kidding.  You generally have to go about 2 miles out of the way to turn left (and to do so you have to do an elaborate U-turn).  We had about 15 different destinations in the three days we were here and we got lost going to pretty much all of them.  This was with Google Maps, GPS, and calling for directions.

There are no chain restaurants.  As a traveler, I often depend on restaurant chains for my meals.  This is mainly because I am not generally keen on adventuring into places called “Jimmy’s Beef” where they have grease caked on every surface and pictures of food instead of a menu.  Give me Panera, Chili’s, PF Changs, Chipotle, Maggiano’s, or any other restaurant I recognize.  As a disclaimer here…I generally NEVER eat at chains at home… I am all about adventuring with food but not by myself in sketchy places.

Everything is dirty. 

People don’t smile here.  If they do, it is typically a creepy guy trying to hit on me.

So, I am sitting at the airport (shocker, huh?) with a three hour delay (another shocker) counting the minutes until I get out of this nasty place.  I have plenty to entertain myself with.  Currently, I am trying to figure out why a husband and wife couple are sitting about 15ft apart and yelling over all the airport noise to converse while there are about 5 open seat on each side of both of them.  10 minutes ago she was sitting on his lap.  Interesting.

If you’re getting married…

Be sure to know exactly what you want from your florist!  And be ready to spend a ridiculous amount of money.  I thought venues were expensive but I think flowers take the cake!

My advice to all future brides…cut out as many pictures as you can and be flexible with what you want.  Oh yeah, and be ready to cut a check for at least $5,000-if you are in Chicago at least.  This is the number most florists have told me they start with.  Also, be sure to consider things other than flowers…there are tons of cool centerpiece ideas out there.

Also, if a florist makes you feel like crying.  Fire their a**.

This has been a public service announcement.